love is truly blind

everyone has their own rights and it influences how they interact people.
i have my own perspective about you. the way you treat me most, and the way you treat others.
yes it doesn't bring me into your private problems, but i am getting involve indirectly and i just want you to know that you are not mature enough to solve this problems.
you need an expert to give you solutions and to open you mind wider.
try to think if you were me. i don't think i'm right. and i don't think that you are right.
and please don't act like a child. i know that you're beautiful, but i don't care because you're my friend. you don't even know how deep is his feeling and you hurted him. i can understand him because i do feel the same way.
i feel so comfortable with my life right now. that's not the reason if i forgot you.
i have my own reasons to do this. and i personally think that i don't need any apologize from you and i won't say sorry until i really feel guility about this.
you must open you three eyes and realize first before you have your own conclusion of my friends and me.
i don't care about your opinion of me. you can do what you want to do. i won't never understand you because you don't.
i don't care if you shared and spread out a bad gossip about me to your friends. i really don't care because i don't have time to think about it.
and my friends will never hear and change their behavior to me. why? because they have known me for so long, more than you. :)
i'm so busy with my own happiness, assignments, schools, and my personal problems.

just to let you know : i'm sure that you will never know what love is, until you get hurt because of someone that you really love. maybe not now. not then, but you will. after you experience that, you automatically learn how to love, how to keep your relationship longer with happiness, how to laugh and sharing problems, how to make people around you happy, and how to fix broken heart.

someday you will understand.

time is moneyyy

i really don't want to waste my time for things that bring me sad, down, and cry.
i used to have my spare time to do something benefit for me and others.
my time is too precious to think about people who don't ever think and care about me.
i like to make myself happy with my effort, even it's hard.
all that i know is i am going to enjoy my life starting from now.
problems are too easy to solve :-)
just make it simple and make it easy. relax because everything is going to be alright.
ii'm proud of who i am.
i don't care what people think about me, except if they critized me, i would hear.
hmm i'm trying to be better me, because life is too short, time cycles and won't go back to the past. that's why i have no regretn, it just a lesson for me.was my worst experience, but i get the best lesson of my life to be better in the future.

i don't know

i don't know about my feeling. it divides into two which i can't determine what i want right now. maybe my heart doesn't know which is more important. as time goes by i remember the way my ex boyfriend treated me last time when we were in a relationship. we were so rarely met each other and he was busy at that time. yes i could understand. but things are different right now. he treats me differently now. he usually see me on the weekend and we just hanging and playing together. he didn't do this thing when we were in a relationship. it makes me confuse. he says he still love me until now and it's sincerely without any reasons to make me hurt and pain.
what should i do now? i really don't mean to make him hurt but i also don't know about my feeling. i like him and i like my senior. i can't decide yet. i don't even know my senior. even i don't know about my feeling and who is stronger. should i survive my feeling to my senior? he doesn't even need that. he doesn't even know me. let this be answered by time passed. maybe this will change so i know what is the best. but please i don't want to make my ex boyfriend hurt. i really appreciate him and his effort to make our relationship better. but let me erase and throw one of this unimportant feeling, but i don't know which one.

i love you more and more each day, my senior.

hope you feel the same someday.

i am just happy to see your smile :)

if you passed around my class everyday, i would be very happy :)

please, let me love you, even it is just a simple feel,

but i am trying to survive.

i really really really want to know you, my senior.

i am waiting.

ada plagiat status fb gw

aduh. kenapa zaman sekarang masih ada aja orang ga kreatif ya? bisanya cuma ngikut-ngikut doang. sama persis lagi kata-katanya. hey lo! kalo udah dikasi pikiran n otak, tuh dipake buat mikir. sori yah kalo gw ngomong agak kasar. karena gw ga suka kalo kata-kata yang uda gw pikirin dengan hati n logika, di pake gitu aja sama lo tanpa ada usaha. mw lu apa sih? lo ga ada ide? mw ngerebut hati cewe lagi? duh itu bukan lagi urusan gw ya. gw ga mw ikut campur, tapi please kalo lo emang bener-bener gentle, jangan pernah pake kata-kata gw atau puisi gw deh. karang sendiri dong. ga usah nyebar-nyebarin kata-kata gw n ngaku-ngaku kalo itu kata-kata lo. ga suka gw sama gaya lo. ganggu gw banget! kurang puas apa lo udah nyakitin gw ampe segininya. jujur gw risih banget liat tingkah laku lo. sangat ga memuaskan n ga enak dipandang. kyk gitu mw dibilang temen? hah? temen apa tuh?

sekarang tuh pinter"nya kita aja deh mw cari temen. ga semua temen itu baik. ga semua temen itu menguntungkan. n GA SEMUA ORANG BAIK ITU BAIK. logika aja deh sekarang di bandingin sama realita yang ada. Kalo orang itu uda ga nguntungin, ngapain ditemenin? bikin gw rugi aja. ga ada manfaatnya. ga penting juga kan. dunia luas n gw gpp kalo kehilangan temen kea lu. toh yg mw temenan ma gw banyak. apa lagi lo uda nyakitin gw n bawa memori yang buruk banget ma gw. ga usah manis" lagi deh. ga mempan. gw ga semudah itu buat tersipu-sipu ya. usaha lu semua sia-sia kalo mw bikin hub pertemanan kita balik kea dulu lagi. uda males gw. gw udah ga ada sama sekali kepercayaan ke lu. ga usah lagi lu yakinin gw. ok.

mendingan sekarang kita sendiri-sendiri aja. belajar mandiri. hidup gw ga cuma tergantung sama lu. n gw yakin lu juga pasti begitu. buka mata hati n pikiran juga. coba memandang dengan mata terbuka n jangan dengan sebelah mata. jangan merusak diri sendiri n jangan pernah nyakitin orang lagi kalo lo emang ga mau disakitin.

1 lagi. kalo mw dapet kata-kata bagus, mikir sendiri yah. gw ga suka kalo cara lo kea gini. buktiin dong. lo cowo bukan sih? hidup gw jauh jauh jauh lebih bahagia tanpa lo sekarang. ga bohong. lo itu mimpi buruk gw. pergii lo! pergiiiiiiiiiiii! pergi sono jauh-jauh dari gw. jangan pernah mucul didepan gw lagi. sekarang hidup gw udah bahagia. jauh lebih bahagia daripada sebelumnya. lo harus tau itu. terakhir, ga usah terlalu ngerasa kalo diri lu tuh ganteng. pacaran juga cuma main-main. apaan tuh. lo tuh ga mikirin ada di posisi cewenya ya. liat aja ntar suatu saat nanti lo juga bakal di gituin. pegang omongan gw. camkan itu. jangan pernah ngeremehin gw.

pelajaran yang bisa gw ambil :
orang yang bilang sayang sama kita, belum tentu dia benar" sayang sama kita.
orang yang tidak pernah bilang sayang sama kita, belum tentu dia tidak sayang sama kita.
yang kita perlu cuma buka mata, hati, dan kesempatan.
dan menjadi lebih peka dengan lingkungan sekitar yang penuh dengan kebohongan, kepalsuan, kemunafikan, dan juga ada ketulusan yang tersembunyi.

jahat

pergi kamu!
pergiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii !
pergi jauh sana.
aku ga suka liat kamu lagiiiii !
aku muak.
aku kesel.
aku ga ngerti sama apa yang terjadi.
kenapa aku bisa terpikat sama kamu.
pergiiiiiiiiiiiiii jauh !! kamu cuma bisa nyakitin aku doang.
kamu ga punya hati. mata kamu semua tertutup.
aku benci kamu. sangat. dan ini yang aku mau.

to avoid something

i am going to delete my posting which titled "no regret,just lesson". why? because i afraid that he will read it and he feels like he did it to me. i just don't want to remember those suck things! like it really wastes my time. i don't want to know him. i don't want to see him. sucks! go away from me bullshit. i don't need you anymore, i found what i've been looking for.
but still.. thanks for the memories that we have spent together through months and day by day. enough. please. i can't count on you anymore. i don't believe you anymore. that's okay. we better be just friend. you are not handsome. jadi please behave! jangan sok ganteng deh. don't pretend that you're handsome. my life will be better without you, but you have to know that you give me a very big lesson and experience to face these things! playboy. go away from me! hell-you!
you go your way, i'll go mine.
live you life, and i'll live mine.
we've better off separated.
okay.

teori baru

temen gw ada yang bilang tentang teori baru.
bahwa kita itu ga mungkin bisa lupain seseorang yang benar-benar kita sayang, yang kita bisa tuh cuma membiasakan diri untuk hidup tanpa dy.
hal ini diumpamakan dengan air tenang yang dilempar batu pasti akan galau, setelah itu akan tenang kembali tetapi batunya tetap di dalam air itu.

itu hukum alam.
batu yang dilepar ke kolam yang tenang, akan tenang lagi nantinya.
batu itu adalah orang yang kita sayang.
sedangkan air itu adalah diri kita sendiri.

ya mungkin ada benarnya juga bahwa seiring berjalannya waktu, orang yang kita sayang itu tak kan pernah bisa kita lupakan. semakin kita coba untuk lupakan, semakin ada bayang-bayangnya. tentang apa yang pernah dilakukan bersama, kebahagiaan, kesedihan, kekecewaan, semua berbuah yang pada akhirnya menjadi kenangan.
membiasakan diri tanpa dy itu sulittt sangat sulitttt T.T apalagi kalo orangnya masih ada disekitar kita. kita cuma bisa berjanji pada diri kita sendiri dan membuat suatu pilihan.
hidup adalah sebuah pilihan, pilihan, pilihan dan pilihan.